This post is an excerpt from,
"God, Why Am I Not Married? 9 Reasons You Might Still Be Single".
The Eve Complex (pg 64)
One of the main goals of the enemy is to pervert and distort God’s will, image, and purposes, especially in our minds (2 Corinthians 11:13–15). Since one of the primary ways that we understand God is through understanding ourselves, he seeks and has always sought to distort our identity. This is exactly what he did in the garden when he tapped into Eve’s desire to be like God and suggested that not being completely like Him in terms of knowledge somehow made her inefficient. Then, he presented a means by which she could remedy the false perception he fed her of herself (Genesis 3:5). Unfortunately, it didn’t take much for her to fall for his scheme, especially when he so cleverly mixed a little bit of lie with a whole lot of truth.
It was true that she lacked knowledge. It was also true that if she ate the fruit she would know the knowledge of good and evil. What was untrue was that she wasn’t perfectly fine the way she was, even with her lack of knowledge. “A little leaven leavens the whole lump” (Galatians 5:9), so much so that we usually have very little idea what’s happening and that we’re actually being deceived. But just as the enemy was there to push Eve off course from God’s plan, he was also there to push her and Adam off course and distort the true intention of God’s punishments. I can just image how they both must have felt and thought after leaving the beautiful lush garden and God’s peaceful and loving presence. We still have some evidence of that backlash today, as many men refuse to accept the authority or even the advice of women. Nevertheless, the enemy added his own “two cents” to God’s curses, in order to turn a moment of regret into a lifetime of confusion and struggle. And since Adam and Eve were no longer under God’s covering, he set out to finish destroying what he started with, which was their identity and their relationship.
I’m sure as Eve left the garden with Adam, she couldn’t help, with some instigation from the enemy, but feel like everything was her fault. How could she not feel this way, especially after Adam’s true feelings about her role in the whole thing came to light in his explanation to God (Genesis 3:12). I’m sure she felt that if only she had listened to Adam, who had been nothing but a perfect friend and companion to her, none of this would’ve happened. In Adam’s regret, he could retreat to a place and time where she didn’t exist, which he alluded to by suggesting that before she came along, he didn’t have a problem being obedient (Genesis 3:12). He could think about how things were when it was just him and God and long for the opportunity to prove that he could handle the responsibility of being the head and an exercising authority once again (which I explain further in chapter 7)―but most of all to make God proud. However, Eve couldn’t retreat to such a time. She had no knowledge of what life was like before or without Adam. All she could do was long for the way things had been between them before their exile.
Try to imagine how hard it must have been for her to have someone who was previously completely open to her, who was now closed off―someone who was enthralled with her was now more concerned about his own regrets and burdens not to mention keeping her in line. I’m sure that, just like women today, she longed for him to see and treat her the way he did before. Unlike any other woman in history, she felt the heartbreaking consequences of her mistake every day when she looked into Adam’s eyes and recognized in his demeanor that he no longer saw her the same. The disconnection she felt from Adam affected her deeply, especially since her purpose for being created was based on Adam’s need for her (1 Corinthians 11:19). One could only imagine that what filled the space of her new found emptiness were heartbreak, shame, and at times even desperation.
Now when you remember that these kinds of negative feelings, both Adam and Eve’s, all come from the demonic influences that they were now exposed to, it’s not hard to imagine a woman who probably just didn’t feel good enough at times. And coupled with the fact that women are receivers, it’s easy for us to internalize negative experiences and conclude that something is wrong with us. As a result, what was passed down to most women along with our hereditary sin nature (Romans 5:12) was that same feeling of shame and regret Eve experienced, which I call the Eve Complex.
"The Eve Complex is a deeply rooted psychological belief in which a woman is burdened with feelings of guilt, inadequacy, and a loss of identity by the enemy in an effort to keep her entangled in and bound by the sins of Eve. "
Why is it that young girls are so susceptible to low self esteem and insecurity? Why is it that so many women feel the need to prove that they are worth keeping in relationships? Why are so many women competitive and jealous of one another? It all stems from the Eve Complex. The Eve Complex is a deeply rooted psychological belief in which a woman is burdened with feelings of guilt, inadequacy, and a loss of identity by the enemy in an effort to keep her entangled in and bound by the sins of Eve. Remember, as long as he can distort how we see ourselves, he can prevent us from reconnecting to our true source and Heavenly Father.
After he was able to alter Eve’s perception of herself, just like he did in the garden, he then presented her with a remedy of how to repair it, which was to earn back Adam’s love and prove, just like Adam, that if given another chance, she could live up to the role and position she had been given. The problem with this is women don't need to prove themselves to anyone―not even God. All we need to do is accept our true identity and that identity is in who God says we are―not fallen men.
This complex usually forms its roots in females when they’re young. It translates specific experiences, disappointments, feelings of emptiness or disconnection, and traumas into proof that the girl experiencing them is somehow at fault and not good enough. And once the girl believes them, she simply does what she was designed to do which is to manifest and reflect it. I think all young girls and women sense that they’re supposed to be loved and adored like Eve once was, but when they don’t see it or receive it, they more easily accept the enemy’s reason as to why. Girls will more easily believe this and adopt such a belief as their identity when there’s no loving father in the home to combat or contradict it.
Stephanie Kekeocha was born and raised in Chicago, IL. She has a bachelor’s degree in Liberal Arts and Sciences from University of Illinois at Chicago (UIC) and various coaching certifications. (read more)
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